Today, I enjoyed you so much! I enjoy you every day. But today, after a hard morning of frustrations for both of us, I took the opportunity to do something different. We normally go to the park or play in the driveway to release energy or have a change of scenery, but today I just wanted to be with you. I asked you if you wanted to go to the coffee shop. The one at the end of our street. I told you, you could pick out something special to drink...which you never really get to do. I asked you if it would be ok that Kendra rode in the stroller and I would just hold your hand and we would walk together. Being that we always take the double stroller, I wasn't sure what you would think. I was hoping we could sit inside together (and that double stroller will not fit through the door). You were ok with that. We started our trek. You were still a bit upset from the late mornings' events. We talked about it. We talked about other things. You told me you didn't want to crunch the leaves on our path, you only wanted me to do it. You held my hand. I told you how much I enjoyed holding you, listening to you talk.
About half way there you informed me you weren't crying anymore and you were happy! That made my heart glad. You picked up a stick. We walked a little further. We did 'red light' at each street to look for cars and then 'green light' to go. We crossed the street together and you said, "I see the coffee shop mom!" And you were right, we were not far. I told you Kendra had fallen asleep, she must have enjoyed our voices or the cool Autumn air. As we got closer I held your hand tighter. We neared the door and you told me you love coffee all the time. We went inside. You picked chocolate milk. I got my dark roast. We paid and then I told you to pick any place you wanted to sit. You chose the comfy chairs in the back corner. I parked the stroller and set down our drinks.
You looked at me and smiled as I helped you open the straw and poke it through the hole in the milk carton. You were so happy. I was so happy to just be with you! As we sat there I found myself rushing ahead in my thoughts..."ok, we will finish our drinks, then go potty, then get going to the park because if Kendra wakes up she will want to get out. No wait, she will probably want to nurse, it's probably better to nurse here, but then she won't want to get back in the stroller. Yes, we should leave to go to the park, I'll nurse there. I packed my nursing cover. That way she can play when we are done..." And so on. And there you were. Just sitting there. Drinking your milk. And then I realized, this is it. This is why I'm here, to be with you. Who cares if Kendra wakes and needs to eat or get out and play? For now, she is sleeping and I can listen to you. Just you. Find out what's in your heart and mind. And so, I asked, "Emi, what's your favorite color?" And your smile beamed, "Green!" "and what's your favorite animal?" You thought for a moment. "A green sheep!" And you threw your head back to laugh. And so I went on to ask you all kinds of questions! Your favorite food, friends, things you like to do, your favorite thing about Jesus and so on. You loved answering! "Ask me more mom!" I was tickled at your answers. We looked at the mural on the wall and talked about what we saw on the picture. Then you asked, "Mom, what's your favorite color?" "Purple! I love purple!" You giggled, "ok ask me more questions mom and then I'll ask you one when you're done asking me!"
I had so much fun with you! You have such a lively spirit. You are so creative! You asked if you could put your feet up on the chair and lean back with your hands behind your head. You said you wanted to relax. I've had many conversations over coffee, but this has been, by far, my favorite. We spent a half hour talking, laughing and playing games with our empty cups. I told you how much I loved you. Lately, you've been stopping in the midst of your play, looking into my eyes and telling me you love me. I could have sat there with you for hours today. And even though I know I could do that everyday in our own home, there was something about not having toys or house chores to distract us. We could just sit and enjoy eachothers' company. I think I am going to make this a special time for us, me and you, every so often. Maybe in the winter time you'll want your own hot chocolate like we make at home. I'm sure I'll look forward to more conversations like this as you get older too, but even now, I still very much enjoy just sitting with you. Being here, together.
Kendra woke up after a nice long nap. And surprisingly didn't want to get out. We made our bathroom stop and headed back out on our walk home. Hand in hand. Thank you, my sweet Emi for giving me you. For letting me know your secrets, your thoughts, and what is going on in your world. I'm so blessed to be apart of it every day!
